This is quite possibly the most pointless thing I will ever write. So… Enjoy!
When I go abroad, I love to watch foreign telly. Even though I have very little idea what they’re talking about, I enjoy seeing the differences between our superior British TV and their inferior outlander television. Think hetheth etheth etheth from The Fast Show. But more than that, I’m a language-lover, and so I just enjoy hearing authentic foreignese.
I recently went to Budapest. One night, I sat up till the wee hours (that’s Scotch for “small”; I was in Scotland recently, too) watching a film. I enjoyed it. Even though it was complete bollocks. But I have no idea what it was called and therefore I cannot do my obligatory post-film ritual of looking up every little thing about it on IMDB.com. This is now driving me to despair.
If I explain the film to you, Dear Reader, will you please psychically intuit its name and let me know? I will reward you handsomely. Behold! 100 Hungarian florints!
No, seriously: I will send you this coin if you tell me the name of the film (I’m not joking). A whole hundred! I swear it by the old Gods* and the new.**
So, the film then…
And that’s about all I remember. Good bye.
*YHWH, Allah, Zeus.
**Britney Spears, Jordan, Tom Hardy.
© 2014 Bryan A. J. Parry
I’m quite a private person. I like to keep certain things to myself; I didn’t even tell my work colleagues that I was getting married. They found out whilst I was away. Hilarity ensued upon my return: But.. you got… whuh!?. But despite that, I’m quite proud of the wedding me and my wife managed to arrange. And so, whilst I’m too shy to share it with any actual humans, e.g., my work colleagues, I feel free to share it with you netizens.
Below is a video of the ceremony filmed by gag producciones which I’ve put on my YouTube channel. I hope it gives you pleasure and maybe even some ideas for your own wedding.
I turned thirty years of age a few days ago. No sooner had I got my GP to sign me off work with depression than I saw the monstrosity above.
But you’ve always had a face, Bryan, you might remark.
But that’s not what I’m referring to, oh Observant One. Rather, I am talking about the distinctly WHITE hair extruding from my nasal cavity (you can even see it in this crappy webcam shot!).
WTF!? I didn’t even know your nose hairs could go grey!
Thanks for that, God. Next you’ll be telling me that your pubes go grey and your genitals shrink with age, too.
"Find what you love and let it kill you." – Charles Bukowski
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